Parenthood 101--Trosper Style

A few weeks ago I volunteered to speak at Toastmaster's the next day to replace someone who wasn't able to be there for their speech.  I just had a couple of hours to prepare so I had to choose something I felt comfortable to talk about without much research and preparation.  So I decided to speak about Parenthood.  Now I'm sure I could find really wise advise if I did research.  After all Parenthood is one of the most difficult, and important subjects.  It is also one with many varying opinions. So, I decided to just consider it from my point of view and my own experiences.  

Parenthood 101.  "Wouldn't it be wonderful", we all say, "if each baby came with a manual?"  Why yes it would!  Especially if it was particular to that specific child.  Heaven knows one manual wouldn't work for all children.  I found that out raising my three boys.  Each one was incredibly unique.  There are a few general points to start from but then we have to individualize raising each child.  What works for one kid certainly won't work for the next.  That would just be too easy.  

I am not an expert on Parenting.  However, I do have some expertise because I was a child once.  My parents were great parents.   I didn't start admiring them after I became an adult, I thought they were pretty amazing even when I was a teen.  .  There were things I wanted to follow that my folks did, and things I wanted to change.  Added to the things I learned  as a child being parented, there were even more bounteous lessons in the 47 years I have been a parent to my three son's.  Again, some good, and some bad choices taught me what to do the next time I needed to use those skills.  There was no option.  I couldn't fail, and then give up.  There was no abdicating on Parenthood, so I needed to learn from challenges, successes, and failures.  Furthermore, my kids are now Parents and I can continue learning from their styles of Parenting.  I personally think they are doing a great job of Intentional Parenting their sweet adorable children.....my grandchildren.  So you see I do have a bit of a soapbox I can stand on here.  

Back to Toastmasters and my speech on Parenting.  Time was an issue.  It always is.  I have so much more to say on any given subject than the clock allows.  Silly me to think I could cover Parenting in 6-8 minutes.  It just couldn't happen and didn't.  I need to learn to break huge subjects into much smaller bites.  I will try to do the same with these blogs.  

I feel there are seven key elements to Parenting.  These are....

.....love them

.....teach them

.....play with them

.....respect them

......discipline them

......sacrifice for them

......love them, unconditionally

My intent is to write a blog on each of these seven elements for the next seven days.  It will be a challenge for me.  Maybe you can gain something as well.  Maybe it will  be a springboard to a conversation between you and your spouse for your kids!  

One thing I want to clarify right now is that even though I have expertise on Parenting, and there are certainly other experts on Parenting that you can research.  YOU, however, are the most important person raising your children.  YOU and the other parent you parented with, have the clearest cut expertise for your child.  There will be times in your life that you will think anyone can do a better job, but that is not true.  

Combine your efforts with your Heavenly Father and your stewardship over your children will flourish.  When you forget to work with your spouse (or the other parent) and your Heavenly Father you may flounder.  Also, you will have many challenges along the way.  As stated earlier the challenges will differ with each child.  We also need to keep up to date with possible chasms that our kids can fall into in each generation.  

Those of us that willingly choose Parenthood as our main career don't get to get off the ride before it is completed.  So buckle up and enjoy this "white knuckler ride".  

It's nice...

This morning as I got close to work I was stopped by a crossing guard. There were several happy children hopping, skipping, and chattering to each other, and to their Moms. "How nice" I thought "that these mothers are walking their kids to school." There wasn't just one Mom present, there were many. As a matter of fact at that crosswalk and continuing down the street a couple of blocks I saw probably fifteen mothers with their children. It didn't seem as if it was a chore either. There were smiles on their faces and a bounce in their steps as they responded to the needs and conversation of the kids. They waved and nodded to other mothers, and to those cars passing by.

It made me happy, and it made me think; "Did I ever walk my kids to school?" and "If I did, would I have been joyful about it?" Another interesting thing about these mothers is that they were all Latino.

I have read many negative e-mails, posts, and heard many surly comments about the Latino people who "MAY" have crossed our borders illegally. Degrading remarks have been made about their cost to us as tax payers, especially filling our jails. I do believe that we need to fix the immigration flow across our borders, and yes there are some staggering costs to us as tax payers and this blog is not to bring up that conversation.

I just merely wanted to note that many of my clients (Insurance) are from the Hispanic culture, probably many have family members who are not "legal". Some grandmothers may have been in this country forever, and they are kind, good people. They are responsible: they have insurance, and they pay on time with cash every month. They are hard working, some of them have multiple jobs to support their families. Many of them are also frustrated with those from their culture and in their community who don't show the best examples. They are a loving people who want to be embraced and want to embrace us. Yes, we do need to correct the influx of those who illegally cross our borders. But, don't malign them on other counts, or at the very least don't paint them all with the same broad brush.

Those little kids walking, talking, and laughing with their mothers on the way to, and I venture to say, from school are bound to be good people. They are certainly getting the kind of start we all should emulate!