Probably when I was about five years old I decided what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wanted to be married and have a family. While going to school, trying to make the grades, taking career tests, preparing for college I still knew that my career would be a homemaker. There was nothing demeaning about my choice. There couldn't be a loftier position to attain, or a happier one.
My parents set me up good. If they had problems or frustrations I didn't see them. My mom loved my Dad and my Dad adored my Mom and that was all there was to it. When they danced they looked into each others eyes with dewy eyes and created romance as they glided across the floor. As Dad would leave for work they would share a kiss.... two quick pecks and one long. I can just see my little five year old self swept up with the magic of the whole thing.
Imagine those same parents being anxious and frustrated when their 18 year old daughter isn't focused on the college degree and career but instead moves headlong into marriage with her brain filled with all the romantic notions they put there. But, there is absolutely no doubt, no doubt at all that when I was at that little alter in Las Vegas, I saw stars in his eyes too. Actually I was concerned that I couldn't match the depth of love that I saw in his eyes. We were off into the wonderland of marriage.
41 years, 4 months, 5 days, 3 amazing sons, 2 wonderful daughters in law, 2 beautiful granddaughters, a plethora of friends, a million kisses, two million "I love you's", several challenges met, a couple dozen trials overcome, and we split.
How the heck is that possible? We're the Trosper's! Nothing can pull us down. But it did. There were no horrible heart wrenching arguments, no accusations and pointing fingers, just the slow demise of a dream, a career, a lifestyle.
Who am I now? If I'm not a Mrs. what do I hang my hat on? How do you go about re-inventing yourself at 60?
Trosper Family 2016
7 comments:
No need to reinvent your whole self. Just a part of you. Granted, a major part, but you are still a great friend, mother, daughter, aunt, cousin, etc.
Well thank you...but it is a major part...and a long developed part. Longer than 42 years.
I'm grateful that I have those other parts though. I have a life still, and manage to enjoy it! There are just those times...
Remember that we love you.
I do.
I didn't read this carefully on our first comment...are you and Brother Trosper no longer together? Is it official or just a separation? I am sad to hear it either way. Lora and Carl Westphal
We are not together any longer. Not sure at this point where our paths may lead us. I certainly never thought it would lead here. But there is so much to be grateful for. On the top of the list are some fantabulous years together, an awesome family, and so many supportive friends.
Les
We are sad to hear that, but you seem to be handling it well, and we wish you the best.
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