The Lord is my constant!

A friend recently told me that she had never seen anyone get through the divorce process as easily as me. A family member asked me how I managed the emotions during my recent trials. There have been other questions and comments indicating people are surprised at my survival. Believe me there have been tough times, alot of tears, questioning myself, my life, my choices. After watching.....and totally crying through conference this morning, I became certain that the reason I have survived is because the Lord is by my side, and I am aware of his presence every moment in my life.

When the kids were out of the home I wondered if Bud and I would continue our activity in the church, or did we go as an example to our children. Of course the gospel was a part of our life. Even when we moved to Virginia we immediately found our place in the church. Our life actually became consumed with living a righteous life.

So when Bud left our home I wondered how strong my testimony was. Would I have the faith on my own to continue going to church when no one was around to remind me? No one would know if I went or not. What I learned about myself was that my faith, my testimony is not predicated on my children, my friends, my family, or even my husband. It is mine. Whatever happens in my life or with those aorund me the gospel is true, and I am never alone.

I am so grateful for the knowledge that I AM a child of God. I know my Heavenly Father loves me. My picture is on His refrigerator and in His wallet I have no doubt. I recognize the beauty in this world that He gave us to remind us of His presence. His greatest gift was allowing His son to come to this earth. I am so thankful for my Saviors teachings, His example. My heart is full of gratitude today. I am grateful especially this week for His sacrifice. That He chose to understand MY pain, and die for MY sins. I know His walk was lonely, and because he knows loneliness He does not want me to be alone. I feel His presence, and the ever comforting presence of the Holy Ghost. I also know He wants me to feel joy. I count so many blessings that give me joy.

There are so many angels that respond to the Lord's promptings when I hit those difficult moments. I am so thankful for those who are receptive to His call to serve me. I am also blessed when I have the opportunity to go outside myself and serve others as well.

I am blessed indeed. The gospel is precious to me. Even though my children are not all active in the church, and Bud may not be. I can see the influence that being raised in the church has had on them. They are such good people with such strong standards and ethics. I am proud of them and I am eternally grateful for the plan of happiness, the prophets who guide us so wisely, the Savior, and my Father in Heaven. I am not alone, and I have so much to be happy about, and so much life to live. Even though it isn't the life I planned. We aren't able to control everything about our lives, but there are so many choices we can make, we have power to BE!