"KIDS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS"

In six weeks I will be 69 years old.  I raised three sons, plus a few extras along the way I now have seven grandchildren.  My oldest granddaughter just started college.  Why am I choosing now to start recording funny antics and conversations with kids.  (Shrugs shoulders)  Why not?  

While I was a young mother I was too busy chasing them around and laughing with them to record those little tid bits you want to remember forever.  Let me encourage every young mother not to worry about what to write it down on, don't try to be all organized, just get it down.  You  are lucky you have a phone always tucked in your pocket.....there is a note pad on it.  Mine would have been on toilet paper, kleenex or who knows what.  But it wouldn't have mattered.  I wish I had a stack of tissues with cute sayings tucked in some drawer to record into a book of memories now.  Now that I have more time.  

I can always add to a blog so I am going to start this little epistle and add to it as I hear my cute little grandkids sharing wisdom, bringing back to earth with a great question, and seeing life through their little eyes.  

Markie (2 1/2 years old):  Mommy can you read me a book?

Mommy:  Mommy is doing something important right now, but pretty soon I'll have some time.

Coming back in 3-5 minutes.

Markie:  Mommy, can you read me a book now?

Mommy:  Sorry Markie I don't have time right now. In a little while I will.  

After returning several times:

Markie:  Mommy,  I have lots of time.  I'll give you some of my time so you can read me a book.  

Little Marque as my first child was able to hone my skills as a mother.  He helped me look at the world through his eyes.  I never said "I don't have time" to my kids again.  Not that I jumped every time they called, but I did learn that I needed to do a better job of explaining.  What is time anyway to a two year old?

We have our little idioms but do they make sense to a child?  No, and what comes from it?  Hilarity.  

Daddy (We were coming home very late at night and the kids were falling asleep in the back seat):

Kids, it is way past your bedtime so when we get home I want you to hurry in and "hit the sack".

Mommy (after herding the kids in the garage door)  Scotty, what are you doing in the closet?

Scotty (2 1/2  years old, turning a round and holding up a paper bag)  I got a sack.  (He proceeds to strike the sack with his fist)  

Mommy confused suddenly remembers:  Oooooh, Daddy said to "hit the sack".  

Did he really honestly not get what daddy meant, or had he already gotten the idea for a sarcastic punchline at 3?  We didn't know but we sure laughed.  

Two and three year old kids are super funny.  They can communicate now and they have been stacking up questions and wisdom for a long time.  Jimmy was 2 when he was hanging around me while I was paying bills.  Something that he wouldn't do later in his life.  He was playing with the calculator.

Jimmy:  Mommy what is this?

Mommy:  It helps mommy add and subtract.  It's a calculator.

Jimmy:  No mom, It's a calcu"now".

MY INCREDIBLE DREAM

MY INCREDIBLE LIFE

Dreams!  So odd how they can affect you in the morning when you wake up even if they are not totally remembered.  The emotion can stay with you, in this case 'me'.     Sometimes the feelings or emotions stay with me throughout the entire day. At times I remember bits and pieces that give me hints why I'm feeling the way I do, and maybe purpose of the dream.  

Today I took from my dream that it was about Bud and I, and so much more than us in the mortal sense.  In the dream experience we were with a lot of people, like on a cruise or some grand vacation.  I was wanting to be kissed, embraced, engulfed by Bud.  He didn't seem to be always anxious but would give in.  Frequently it seemed to be in front of others.  Like I wanted them to be aware that we were a couple.  No, more than that, I wanted them to see that I was in love with him, no matter what.  It was never spoken but I was aware that people around us were curious because they knew that our lives were separated.  I really still wanted people to know that we were not, except in the conventional sense.  It wasn't just for show, it was real, very real.  I just wanted my emotions to be on my sleeve.  I truly felt my heart open up each time he embraced me.  It felt like an outpouring, a release of tension and an embracing of serenity.

Just before I woke up I was swinging.  Every one else in the dream was anxious to move on, and kept calling to me.  I was on a huge swing that took me way up into the clouds, and whooshing back down, then back up to touch the trees. I would look down on everyone with my huge thrusts into the sky and then I was keenly aware of the heavens around me and of all the beauty of the land below.  All the people watched me swing so high, but they were anxious for me to go and begging me to come down.  

I was (and still am) feeling the gratitude, freedom, release, joy, exhilaration and peace from these moments. It couldn't end, if I could help it.  Eventually I slowed down and then I  laid beneath the swing, the sky and the trees with my arms outstretched just taking it all in.  I called to Bud.  I wanted him to embrace this feeling with me.  I wanted him to complete the perfection.  He came reticently.  He stood over me blocking the sun.  His arm was outstretched to pull me up, but I beckoned for him to come into my arms.  He did.  He kissed me.  I felt the weight of his body in my arms.  I wrapped my arms around him and then I woke up.  

When I woke my arms were laying outstretched just as they had been in my dream.  I could still imagine the sky and trees above me.  The feeling of serenity and peace from his embrace and the swing through the skies was still so strong.  I didn't want to move. Laying there in that feeling of complete and utter happiness and unconditional love was the purest description of true bliss.  

Of course I pondered the dream and it's meaning.  When Bud and I married I didn't love him as much as he loved me.  He was a good guy, and I was in love with love.  I was in love with the whole idea of marriage, family, and the idea of love.  Bud loved me completely and utterly.  I can still remember the look of adoration and devotion in his eyes.  Sometimes I felt a little guilty that I didn't feel so strongly.  He treasured me and anyone around us could see that.  He was such an awesome person that I grew to love him with such an abundance of emotion.  I was always so grateful for the person he was.  Looking back I can see that he fought the demons of confusion, fear, shame and dishonesty.  But no one battled harder and succeeded in living a beautiful life full of generosity, fun, and service.  

After I woke up I was so grateful that I learned to love this man so unconditionally that it felt totally perfect in spite of everything.  I want to always keep the feeling of complete , perfect love.  

I pondered about the meaning of his having to be coaxed to show the kind of emotion I was wanting.  That he just seemed to give in to my overwhelming love and need for his embrace.  Then I realized it didn't matter.  His love for me is not nearly as important as my being aware of my total, complete and unconditional love for him.  And it was more than him, it was everything, and everyone.  It was attaining this true pure love in spite of what he felt, or what others feel.  It was about my capability to love in spite of anything or anyone else.  

I love my life, I love Bud, I love the Lord with all my heart and soul. I love the children and grandchildren and posterity our love has created and will continue to grow.  I don't want to die now, but I could.  Because this morning when I woke up I felt that I had fulfilled the purpose and measure of my life by receiving and understanding the gift of pure love.